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Dreadnought HolidayForget tariffs - if you want the perfect way to p-p-p-p-piss off a penguin what you really need is Ky Michaelson's rocket-powered snowmobile.Not one of nature's natural health and safety inspectors, Ky managed to spin helplessly out of control twice before deciding to add some skis to actually steer the thing.Eventually he set a world record of 114mph in what scientists call "the contraption" and is still here to tell the tale. Not such a <a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> after all...

Dreadnought HolidayProper <a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> for you now - survey ship Fugro Mercator applied inadvisable empirical methods to proving an Italian island was exactly where the chart said it would be earlier this week, and accordingly paid the price. It's either that or the captain didn't know his arse from his Elba...

Dreadnought HolidayWeighing 69 tons, boasting two turrets and making no sense, the Char 2C tank remains the most voluminous tank ever built.Commissioned in murky circumstances - the French didn't need a superheavy tank, the French didn't want a superheavy tank, and the naval shipyard that happily accepted the cash couldn't even build a normally heavy tank - everything went tits up when the public discovered they'd paid for a superheavy tank and demanded to see one. Unsurprisingly it was crap.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayThe real tragedy here is that in another era they could have got fifty quid off You've Been Framed for this...<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Sheddi<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/@DreadShips" class="u-url mention" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@DreadShips</a> welcome back, I didn't realise how much I'd missed <a href="https://mstdn.party/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> until this!

Dreadnought HolidayIn a case of literal Brough justice, H&S Wisdom has completely buggered up its attempt to navigate the Humber estuary and will now be stuck outside the Yorkshire town until the next properly big tides in a month or so. If, that is, they're big enough to lift it - and they might not be.And is it a hazard to navigation? Well not there it isn't, no...<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a><a href="https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cjrylxle8pzo" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no" target="_blank">https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cjrylxle8pzo</a>

petes_bread_eqn_xls<a href="https://universeodon.com/@JenLucPiquant" class="u-url mention" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@JenLucPiquant</a> I’m considering this an honorary <a href="https://mastodo.neoliber.al/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> post

petes_bread_eqn_xlsI miss the <a href="https://mastodo.neoliber.al/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> posts from <a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/@DreadShips" class="u-url mention" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@DreadShips</a>

RobertJackson<a href="https://masto.ai/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="tag">#FailureFriday</a> might also apply ...

Dreadnought HolidayDestroyer Ouragan.Built by France, repaired and stolen by the British, then given to the Poles.The Poles discovered it was an absolute bag of nails, and although they badly wanted to fight the Nazis they didn't mean quite that badly. In any event it kept breaking down and they'd be better off walking.Given back to the French, who by now figured everybody was taking the piss, and then offloaded back to a baffled Royal Navy - who eventually scrapped it.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayAnyone aware of modern trends in pubic topiary will know that Brazilians are just a little bit hairy - and none more so than ironclad Javary here.After its first captain understandably refused to sail it across the Atlantic it was successively downgraded from ocean-going battleship to river monitor and finally - after a brief but decisive contretemps with a rebellious shoreside fort - to nothing more than a hazard to navigation.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayMV Explorer.Set off on a "Spirit of Shackleton" cruise 11/11/2007. Re-enacted the spirit of Shackleton in a manner not advertised in the brochure when crew and passengers were forced into small boats whilst their ship succumbed to the ice.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayHMS Cobra - despite only having a short career in the Royal Navy, it did enough to prove that ships equipped with steam turbines could break up and sink just as well as their more conventional stablemates. The reasons for doing so are still debated today...<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayTaking off and landing vertically, flying horizontally, and getting cancelled immediately, the X-13 Ryan Vertijet allegedly arose out of a proposal to develop submarine launched jet fighters.Whilst successful in proving a fixed wing aircraft could safely transfer from horizontal to vertical flight, it resolutely failed to prove any point in actually doing so when y'know, the runway was right there...<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayHMS Cobra. Built to convince the Admiralty of the great benefit of turbine propulsion.Unfortunately also demonstrated the even greater benefit of not building ships that embarrassingly break in half and sink.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayI'll bet you never knew that the troop-carrying mine-laying light cruiser was ever a genuine concept, and by the 13th of September 1939 it no longer was.Pluton here had been ordered to lay a load of mines near Casablanca, the order was then rescinded and the ship ordered to offload the now-fused mines instead. Turns out there's a reason you don't have the fuses in when you do that...Here it is in Casablanca. Should have told them to lay it again, Sam.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayWe've not bothered the lads of the Jeune École for a while, so this here is Le Fulminant - and no, it's not parked in front of another, taller vessel.Built as a coastal defence ship, about the only interesting thing it did was to attack the coast - and more specifically a rock outside Le Conquet that nearly sank it.And coincidentally Le Conquet sounds like a pretty good way to describe the event...<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayThe Royal Malaysian Navy's KD Pendakar concluded its voyage this week in a manner unlikely to result in coffee and biscuits.Although everybody got off safely, unfortunately a diver has lost his life during the salvage operation.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

Dreadnought HolidayBuilt in Scotland for the Russian royal family, superyacht Livadia was unlikely to capsize and kill everyone due to a) being exceedingly round, and b) the royal family flatly refusing to use it.Surprisingly, the performance was reported to be pretty good in almost all respects. The only real issue was a tendency for the hull to hammer itself to pieces on waves, which, y'know, disturbs your sleep. A perfectly Pringular <a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a> that proves once you Popov you just can't stopov.

Dreadnought HolidaySeventy years ago this week, whilst trying to exit Hoek van Holland in a storm, SS Spanker seems to misjudged its position due to the light marking the end of the mole being out.Spanker was duly whipped around, given a stiff beating, and ended up with its bottom utterly ruined. It was eventually demolished in situ after salvage crews realised they were now flogging a dead horse.<a href="https://mastodon.me.uk/tags/FailureFriday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FailureFriday</a>

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